Based on the true soul stories collected in Side by Side: The Sacred Art of Couples Aging with Wisdom & Love, this retreat is designed for all couples, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity, living into the autumn/winter of their lives who are interested in enriching their relationships. Not to be confused with therapy, in this retreat, we will address the realities and opportunities couples encounter with the physical, emotional, and spiritual demands of aging and offer practices to care for and tend to their relationships at this time of life.

“How do we manage the dance between ‘me and we?’ How do we make the most of our time left together? How do we ‘welcome the stranger’ in one another?” are some of the questions animating this program.

In cooperation with Lafayette Christian Church, we will gather at Villa Maria Del Mar, a beautiful retreat center facing the Pacific Ocean in Santa Cruz, California. The time will be rich with opportunities for dialogue, discernment, solitude, and breaking bread with other couples. Participants share stories, view interview clips, and gather in small groups using the Circle of Trust® process.

Side by Side Soup & Story Club

After the retreat, you will be invited to join an optional “Side by Side Soup & Story Club” to meet in small groups for six sessions (more or less) to share a potluck supper and continue discussing the stories in Side by Side in the privacy of your homes. We hope you can join us!

Information & Details

Event time:  Tuesday, February 18, 4:00 p.m.-Thursday, February 20, 1:00 p.m.

Location: Villa Maria Del Mar, 21918 East Cliff Drive, Santa Cruz, California 95062

Cost per person:

Room & Board:

Double occupancy: $310
Single Room Rate: $420
Commuter Rate: $230

Program Fee: $350

Totals:

Double occupancy: $660 per person ($1,320 per couple)
Single Rooms: $770 per person  (1,540 per couple)
Commuter: $580 per person ($1,160 per couple)

(Partial scholarships available upon request)     

Meals: Coffee, tea, snacks, and all meals are included

Deadline for Registration: January 18, 2024
Participation is limited, so please register as soon as you can.

Registration link: https://www.lafayettechristianchurch.org (scroll to the bottom of home page)

Cancellation policy: The retreat center bills for the reserved rooms regardless of attendance; full refunds for room and board will be based on our ability to fill your place.

For more information, contact the retreat leaders at [email protected] or [email protected]

About the Facilitators: 

Caryl & Jay Casbon met when working at Lewis & Clark College in 1995. Caryl devotes her time to writing, spiritual direction, and retreat work.  After a career in higher education, Jay now focuses on researching men’s studies, investing, and history. The Casbons live in Santa Barbara, California. Visit their website: sidebysideaging.com

What others have said about Side by Side retreats: 

I so admire your courage and encouragement to touch what is real, even if unsettled or painful. There are so few opportunities for us to give our relationship the loving care it deserves. You gave us many opportunities to have deep conversations.  Thank you.

I will say that while my partner and I enjoyed reading the book aloud together and benefitted immensely from it, there was no comparison between the power of the in-person retreat with the times for individual reflection and writing, sharing between couples, and whole group sessions with videos. This experience was much like a night light for the rough spots in our relationship.